David and nabal relationship advice

Abigail: Wise and Determined - Topical Studies

The story of David's relationship with Abigail highlights a time when he nearly 10 Then Nabal answered David's servants, and said, "Who is David, and who . The relief and joy you feel when the advice turns out to be true. I have to assume that Nabal was also abusive to Abigail. The guy was a jerk who messed with the wrong guy, David, who would be king. Abigail interceded on. counsel him. Abigail helped David to avoid making a huge mistake that would have by a couple, Nabal and his wife Abigail. . What wise advice this was!.

But there was something else. Sometimes, I thought, we were writing completely different books! Then, a few years later, it happened.

Early one morning, reading through the Bible, I came across the story of Abigail and Nabal. It was through this story the Lord took the blinders off and gave me new direction. Lessons I Learned from Abigail If you are unfamiliar with the story from the book of 1 Samuel, Nabal was a wealthy and great man in Maon, yet his name meant fool, a part he played well.

He was married to Abigail, who is described as a woman of good understanding and a beautiful countenance. The point is a good woman was married to a fool, but this does not define her; in wisdom, she used this understanding to respond properly.

Five Lessons of Wisdom from Abigail

To bring this into context, we are not talking about trivial marital matters. We are talking about a man the Bible calls churlish and evil in his doings. His servants described him as railing on visitors, a man who could not be reasoned with.

I can only imagine the feelings of loneliness Abigail had to ward off as the relationship never deepened or blossomed because humility was lacking. As the story continues, Nabal foolishly responded to a group of men sent by David to request provisions. Provisions his army had earned. A servant told Abigail, and in wisdom, this gal saved her entire household.


In Scripture, fool is often used for a wicked or depraved person; one who acts contrary to sound wisdom in his moral deportment; one who follows his own inclinations, who prefers trifling and temporary pleasures to the service of God and eternal happiness. That morning I realized that the deepening divide in our marriage was not something I could fix, but that it had to be wisely navigated.

My relationship with my husband would not be better until he made the decision to acknowledge God above his own inclinations. Instead, Abigail responded by quickly getting provisions together to resolve the matter. Abigail was also a trusted woman. The members of the household felt safe informing her of the disastrous response of her husband. She acted as a buffering system. Click To Tweet Abigail was also brave considering that her actions would be found out by her husband, and then she would have to face his violent temper.

The next day, Abigail told Nabal everything that she had done. Nabal immediately has some kind of heart attack and died ten days later from heart failure. Because of his mean, stubborn and perverse character, Nabal had failed to have a true appreciation of who David was. But Abigail knew who David was. She knew that he was an outlaw on the run from King Saul, and she spoke eloquently and prophetically about David and his future reign as king of Israel.

Here is an excerpt: It is not clear whether David sought this marriage because of his attraction to Abigail or if it was for political reasons, but he certainly admired her. Her son is called Daniel in 1 Chronicles 3: Moreover, women were supposed to revere and respect their husbands as leaders, and certainly not say anything bad about them.

He simply lives up to his name! Furthermore, David recognises that Abigail was sent by God. May you be blessed for your good judgment and for keeping me from bloodshed this day.

Five Lessons of Wisdom from Abigail - for the family

She took the initiative when he was unable or unwilling to act, and she even apologised for his rude behaviour. Biblical submission is not about blind obedience or subservience.

Healthy submission is characterised by loyalty, humility, and consideration, and it seeks the greater good. Ideally, it should be mutual and reciprocal, rather than one-sided, with both husband and wife helping and serving each other.